Why it's important to wait for "The News"

On May 16, 2011, MG Siegler of TechCrunch wrote an article burning Google and other news aggregation sites for their inability to keep up with current news.  Fair enough. Sometimes one company breaks a story and other organizations follow suit using the very same information.  Because Reuters is obviously larger than Techcrunch, they often get listed instead of the original source.  Sometimes a company like Sony will post an update to their blog and the identical content will be listed from another source.  Again, this is a fair complaint.  Obviously Sony wants people to read their website and not others.

However...

In February, Google updated their algorithm to give lower priority to "content farms" and those that use clever search engine manipulations (ahem, JCPenney).  In the process, they inadvertently listed Google Places as a webspam site.  A host of original-source sites saw a dramatic drop in visitation and obviously made a stink about it.  Obviously. Mistakes were made and a lot were corrected.

However...

Today, Ryan Cleary was arrested by Scotland Yard for allegedly creating and deploying a "botnet" used against the British SOCA (Serious Organised Crime Agency) site. Because the Telegraph is a British site and were the first major site to report it, everyone followed their lead and re-reported the same content. They claimed that this man is a lead member of the Hacktivist group LulzSec.  You know LulzSec... They are the ones that recently took down the CIA and Senate websites.  Here's the problem:  LulzSec isn't denying that Cleary may have tried to deploy a DDoS attack on SOCA.  What they are saying is that if Cleary did attempt anything, it was after SOCA shut down the servers THEMSELVES.  Moreover, Scotland Yard is now denying that Cleary had anything to do with the attack. LulzSec hasn't denied affiliation with Cleary.  It turns out that Cleary is a shut-in (agoraphobic) that runs one of the IRC servers.

On the 10th of June I wrote an article about how news organizations often report untruthful information because they simply don't know what they are talking about.  It's important to actually listen to what is being said by the police without jumping to conclusions.  Let's face it, LulzSec is just the latest patsy for journalists that try their hand at reporting technology.  It's also important to listen to the "terrorists" and take them seriously when they say, "Yeah.  Whatever. It wasn't us". Trust me, hackers LOVE to brag.

I have one important point to make.  How hard do you think it would be to take down the NY Times or the Telegraph if groups like Anonymous and LulzSec can take down Sony, CIA, banks and large portions of a country's infrastructure?

Maybe it's a good thing that search engines like Google wait a while before listing a news flash.  If they can comb through the misinformation, it is of much benefit.  However, many people don't bother to research the reporting of journalists.  Why would they?  These are respectable outlets, right?

Luke Skywalker is Lame

One could say that Lucas is to blame for this character, but let's assume that young Skywalker is a real person. Don't misunderstand, I love Star Wars. I grew up with it and I swear I spent hours trying to envoke my inner telekinetic powers. But I was a kid and prone to do stupid things, much like Luke. We've all played a certain game at some point in our lives: "Who Would you rather be"... Luke or Han Solo? It's always Solo. Luke or Vader? Easy, Vader. Solo or Vader? Oh, tough one!!! I think I would rather be the Princess than Luke, given the choice.

LIke Admiral Ozzel, he's as clumsy as he is stupid.

Episode IV, "A New Hope"

His first whining words say it all, "But I was going to Tashi [sic] Station to pick up some power converters". Shut up and take the droids to the garage like Uncle Owen told you. In the garage he is then seen playing with a model Imperial Space Shuttle. How old are you? No wonder Uncle Owen doesn't want him to join the academy, he doesn't even have the right toys. Upon entering what is most likely his first trip to a bar, he manages to piss off two creatures by looking like a fish out of water and Obi Wan had to come to the rescue. Fast forward to the scene where Luke finds himself in the garbage compartment with the Princess, Solo and Chewy. He feels something move past his leg and yet doesn't move to high ground and gets sucked into the nasty refuse. This theme plays itself out over and over again throughout the series. Upon escape he sees Obi Wan killed by Vader and screams, "NO", giving away their position and endangering the posse. Again, SHUT UP! Obviously being chased by the Empire, he decides that pining over the death of his short term friend is more important than escape. It's a good thing Solo slapped him out of his funk and made him take the controls of a gun. In the final battle, we see Skywalker trying to destroy the Death Star. The target is a 2 meter shaft along the equator and what does our supposed hero do? Instead of firing directly at it, he decides that traveling horizontally is a better idea. He misses the first shot but doesn't learn the lesson. Luckily he hits the spot on the second approach. This theme repeats itself in the next movie.

Two most important rules about going clubbing:
1. Don't bring the droids
2. Don't touch the bartender.

Episode V, "The Empire Strikes Back"

Definitely the best movie ever, even in light of Luke's ridiculous behavior. In the beginning we see Luke and Han searching for lifeforms on their Ton-Ton's. Luke sees what he thinks is a meteorite and decides to investigate, as if meteorites are uncommon. I mean, for real! With all of the meteorites in the system it would be difficult to see approaching ships. His Ton-Ton starts freaking out and Luke gets bitch slapped by a huge Yeti (<-- lifeform?). For a guy that possess "The Force", his horse is better attuned to danger. Next we see him hanging upside down in the Yeti cave. He harnesses his special powers, retrieving his light saber, freeing himself and slicing the monster's arm off. The arm slicing thing is another topic all together. What does he do next? He leaves the cave! WTF are you doing? Get back in the cave and finish the job, it's cold outside. Kill the Yeti and start a fire. You've got a light saber, it's literally DISARMED... I think I see a way out. He then collapses and hears Obi Wan telling him to go to the Dagobah System. Here, let me rewrite this exchange: "Luke. Luke! Wake up dumbass. You will go to the Dagobah System. There you will learn common sense from Yoda, the Jedi Master who instructed me. He will teach you things like staying in the fucking cave when it's cold outside". It's a good thing Solo shows up to save his sorry ass... again. Instead of repeating words like, "Yoda" and "Dagobah System", he should have said things like, "Cave" and "Fire" and "One Armed Yeti". The Empire then wages a land war using Imperial Walkers which is stupid for many reasons, notably being that tall quadrupeds on ice is a bad idea. Luke doesn't seem to learn from his earlier mistakes because he uses the same tactic as seen in Episode 4. Instead of hitting them from the top or from behind, he approaches them directly on a horizontal pitch. But then he learns that wrapping a cable around the feet will fall the walkers. Ya' think? He gets shot down (predictable) and is almost crushed by a walker when he discovers that he can throw a rope up to the belly of the walker, open it like a Ton-Ton (Solo Style) and throw a grenade inside. I think I see a couple ways out of this problem. On his way to the Dagobah System, R2D2 offers to take the helm and Luke refuses. At which point he wrecks his X-Wing fighter into the marsh (predictable). In the final sword fight, Vader throws debris at him using "The Force", which we know Luke is capable of doing himself. Sure, Luke gets in one good shot but then he loses his hand (Lucas has a hand fetish). After he gets his ass kicked, he starts crying upon hearing the news that Vader is his Father. In order to solve all of his problems, he attempts suicide but can't even manage that. How does one fail by dropping from a cloud city? He gets his sorry ass saved once more, this time by Sissy.

can you say "over-acting"?

Episode VI, "Return of the Jedi"

What an idiot! He shows up to Jabba's compound without knowing that the Princess and Lando are already there. More, he apperently shows up unarmed. What happened to his light saber? He's either arrogant or simply stupid.  What did he think, that Jabba the Gangsta' wasn't going to be armed to the teeth? [If Jabba had teeth, he would have had Grillz]. A light saber would have come in really handy against the dungeon monster, which he was required to fight when Fatboy O.G. opened the floor from underneath him (even C3PO saw it coming). Instead, he uses a bone from an earlier victim and shoves it in its mouth.  Good thing he had a rock to throw at the contol panel (I'm thinking "The Force" would have been more useful). We learn later that R2D2 had the light saber all along when it was propelled to Luke during the sand monster escape. Can you see the same solution that I do? It's called, "Being Pro-Active".  It was sad when Yoda died, but not to Luke. He pined over "Old Ben", who taught him almost nothing, much less than Yoda, who taught him everything. This movie will always be accredited to the hairy, Wizard of Oz munchkins that save the day. Actually, Luke has a very limited role in this episode (Thanks George). What's interesting is that he doesn't actually defeat the Emperor, Vader does. After Luke gives away that he has a sister, he get's his hat handed to him through a series of electrocutions and then Daddy comes to his rescue. The only cool points that Luke gets is making the Oompa Loompas believe that C3PO was a golden God.  On the other hand... they were already tied to the stake and about to be dinner. Again... Be Pro-Active. The scariest thing was when he learned that Leia was his Sister and he didn't freak out about the kiss in Episode 5.

You are unwise to lower your defenses

Next I'll discuss what a complete asshole C3PO is (for being a diplomatic droid) and what R2D2 is actually saying. Well, maybe not. It's mostly comprised of phrases like, "Shut up, metal dick" and "Luke, you are a crying moron like your Father".

Note:  "Rebel Alliance" is just another way of saying "Terrorist Organization".

Three arrested for "Hacking" Sony - or - Journalists try their hand at crime fighting

It was bound to happen. Someone was eventually going to get caught with bloody hands and a weapon and the "Journalists" would link them to other heinous crimes. In this case, it's a home server in Spain and the sloppy work of some vigilantes.

Today, Spanish authorities arrested three men in suspected connection with DDoS attacks against various European banks and Government sites.  They are also being accused of participating in DDoS attacks against certain Sony servers in the past 30 days. They are also being accused of being members of the loosely affiliated group, Anonymous.  OK, fair enough.  All three accusations can be true. However, it is not clear whether they participated in the data mining operation that Sony experienced in April.  What is clear is that most reporters of technology don't know WTF they are talking about or how to report their "facts".

When Sony was attacked in late April 2011, it was done using a SQL injection method and the unique security data of an estimated 77 million users was found unencrypted. Sony discovered the intrusion and shut down the entire Playstation and Qriocity networks.  Let's be clear.  This was not a DDoS attack of any kind.

Today, major news outlets reported that the suspects used a program called LOIC to bring down Sony servers as well as the sites for various Spanish banks and government sites.  The banks? Possibly.  The Gov sites?  Possibly.  Sony?  Nope.  The attacks on PSN after the first huge hack were orchestrated using the information that was obtained from the original intrusion. Moreover, they linked Anonymous to the Sony attacks which they have denied over and over.

Let me put this accusation in perspective.  Let's say that Cartel A has a history of burning down the businesses of it's enemies. Then, your house gets broken into and everyone blames Cartel A.  Cartel A says, "Nope.  We don't steal.  We burn".  Then it turns out that a few gangsters from Cartel A have formed another crime ring, Cartel B.  Cartel B breaks into your house, steals your stuff, and accidentally leaves a lighter with fingerprints behind.  Claiming that these few gangsters used a flamethrower to steal your TV is irresponsible and libelous.

Later in the day, Spanish authorities corrected the journalistic mishaps and clearly stated that, "They have not been associated with the recent attacks on the Playstation Network".  Well, that's good of them to clear that up.  But the genie is already out of the bottle and public perception is really difficult to alter.

You may be asking yourself why I am so upset about this. Am I not defending "criminals"?  Sure, you can look at hackers two different ways.

1. They rob and steal and are generally unproductive. They are terrorists with objectives that most disagree with.
2.  They are fighting for issues that most people don't understand.  They are known as "hacktivists".

I am in both groups.  I think that if Sony goes after a kid for tricking out his ride and thumbs their nose at his friends while keeping the doors unlocked at the business, then they deserve what they get. However, I do not agree with stealing the vitals of customers who's only mission is to play games and watch movies.

But all of the damage hasn't propelled Sony to say, "OK.  Enough.  We're sorry.  We will change our ways".  Sure, they apologized to their user base for the inconvenience and for leaving the doors open at the bank. But they haven't said that they will stop litigating people for tricking their rides. It's this kind of arrogance that keeps putting corporations in trouble.

I am reminded of a scene in the movie "A Bugs Life".  The main villain tosses a single nut at the head of his subordinate and asks, "Did that hurt"? He answers, "no", and then gets pummeled by a silo of nuts.  The villain makes the connection that you can mess with one ant, but if all of the ants unionize you'll get hurt.  So, who is the real villain here?  The big grasshopper or the colony of ants?

Every time a journalist throws accusations at a group that proclaims innocence, they hack the news outlet.  Every time a politician throws accusations at a group that proclaims innocence, they end up hacking the politician. Every time the RIAA sues a kid for downloading music, they get hacked.  Every time Sony and the other media conglomerates have tried to legalize hacking (like installing rootkits on our cd's), they get shut down.

Stop blaming hackers to hide the fact that you're an incompetent asshole!

Update: All three suspects have been released without a bond obligation.